brb.

While we were away at the Tomato Festival, some hideous mutated spawn of Lucifer crossed with a drunk baboon *accidentally* turned off my digital cable and my internet. Instead of venting here an now, I am off to channel my rage in the correct direction and properly lose my shoes up some people's asses. Since I'm right-handed and therefore probably more deft with my right foot, I'll let the digital cable get the left shoe, saving the Good Foot for the internet people.

Take my 200+ digital channels, I don't care. But don't ever mess with my internet.

Can I have a witness?

Be back later. Oh yes, I'll be back.