Saturday, May 31, 2008

And here I thought it was the doobie.

No wonder hippies are so happy:
Scientific backing on incense burning goodness...

"Religious leaders have contended for millennia that burning incense is good for the soul. Now, biologists have learned that it is good for our brains too. In a new study appearing online in The FASEB Journal (, an international team of scientists, including researchers from Johns Hopkins University and the Hebrew University in Jerusalem, describe how burning frankincense (resin from the Boswellia plant) activates poorly understood ion channels in the brain to alleviate anxiety or depression. This suggests that an entirely new class of depression and anxiety drugs might be right under our noses."

Being the amateur researcher, I also can personally recommend the smell of freshly-baked macaroons and a strong cup of just-brewed coffee if burnin' josticks ain't your cup o' tea.

Friday, May 30, 2008

Do you weigh as much as Jay Leno's Head?

So where would you weigh in on the Celebrity Weighing Scale? I would hope for a Kate Winslet but probably lean more toward a Rosie O'Donell today.

Oh, I'm just kidding. Rosie's not a real celebrity.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Think I'll take the day off myself.

Video Freelancer falls victim to an internet freelancing scam.

"After placing an ad online for his freelancing services, the videographer was hired last-minute to film a two-hour long bachelorette party in Brooklyn, New York . When he arrived at the designated apartment, the tenant who answered the door denied any knowledge of the job. As the videographer waited in the hallway and attempted to call the client, but before he could find any answers, two masked men held him up. The thieves pressed a gun to his head while they stole not only his wallet, but also $4,000 in video equipment."

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Tuesday Morning's Scribute to 10am:

My underwear's gone too big. When did that happen?

Well, just call me Sexy Knickers.

Monday, May 26, 2008

NME Radio to launch June 24th

But before that, don't miss one of the test transmission shows there on June 9th with Podfather Ricky Gervais, my unrequited love interest Stephen Merchant, and Karl "Head Shaped Like an Orange" Pilkington.

Look at me, giving you all advance notice and stuff. Now just remind me I said it so I won't miss it myself. Thanks, you're awesome like that.

Sunday, May 25, 2008


I have this theory about exercise. And aliens. It's not my fault. What else am I supposed to do with my time since "The X-Files" went off the air.

My motto is "Unless it comes in a baggie from a man named Kap'n Chillaxin, everything in moderation." Dipped in vanilla irony and rolled in nuts as we quickly run out of natural resources, there is rarely such a thing as moderation. So my advice for today is that if you apply it nowhere else in your life, make sure to apply moderation to the pragmatic life-practice and survival-tactic known as exercise.

Why? For your own good.

Now, on to the aliens: It's not "if" the aliens are coming, it's "when", right? Sure. So what's my point? Well, you know they won't be coming down to observe or learn anything from us. We can't do anything right except over-consume. But let's admit it, we're good at it now. So you do see where this is going, right. Yes. The aliens will just come down to eat us.

So how fit or fat do you want to be when the aliens come down to the slaughter, sorting through us like scattering, gobbling turkeys fattened for market?

Use your head here. Get out and exercise, but not too much.

Sitting around 99.9% of the time will make you overweight and miserable until the aliens get here, and I'm a good enough friend to tell you neither you nor anyone from the planet Xion wants muffin-tops baked up over a waistband anymore. I know from experience. It doesn't matter what kind of experience, just trust me.

So if you insist on sitting around not exercising at all, then you shouldn't eat healthful foods or take antibiotics to keep yourself sustained in your confines. That'll just make you look like a delicacy for a stringy little green bean of an alien. Everybody knows just like the next person except me, aliens will jump on a quality a piece of self-tenderized man-veal.

On the other hand, you don't want to look too good, too meaty, too lean, too tasty. You can't exercise away all the fat and become pure, mouth-watering, electrolyte-plumped muscle -- so much so that you have to wear a belt just to keep your guts from being crushed by your massive pecs and pieces.

So it's my opinion now that unless you just feel like tempting a travel-weary, slightly ravenous alien into eating your nicely-contoured, beautifully-marbled one-stop-shopping hock or two, then you should keep a little fat stashed here and there. Just enough to just make good sense. That's the only real reason I do it. I'm not a complete idiot, you know.

Plus, it makes me feel better about myself when I skip a day or two of jogging and hit the couch and corn chips hard instead. Gotta get that corn while the gettin' is good, son. Soon enough, we'll all be pootering around in compact little spacey iCars fueled with ethanol and smelling of corn puffs, and you won't be gettin' your paws on a bag of flavor-blasted Doritos® for another three or so eons. Trust me, you will thank me so much for this advice one day when we're all jettisoned to the moon to establish those colonies we've always talked about, away from the aliens invading and munching their way around planet Earth.

I know. I can't wait until "The X-Files" movie either. I sure hope Doritos® comes up with a cool new cheesy-flavor for the premier. If Mountain Dew® is awake, they should, too. Hello, Alien-Green Space Fuel that glows in the dark? I'd drink it.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Student isolates microbe that eats plastic.

And they gave him an award made of acrylic. Welcome to the world, son!

I love high-waisted pants and brainy kids. Not enough of either in the world.
But who cares. Rock on, boy, rock on.

Friday, May 16, 2008

I just love making lemonade out of lemons.

So this idea is perfectly sweet with just a right amount of sour. Found in the current Springwise newsletter:

"Launched in February, facilitates the buying and selling of 'ex' jewelry, as well as providing a place for users to share the stories behind it. Along with basic details such as description, condition and price for each item—including a 'for good karma give away' option—users are asked to provide the story behind it, such as whether the breakup was a bad or amicable one. They are also asked to provide a rating, such as 'Loved it but just can’t stand to see it anymore,' 'Great gift, wrong guy' or 'New boyfriend asking questions.''s blog section currently features thoughts from the team behind the site—favourite 'post-breakup activities,' for example—but will soon be expanded to permit users to blog as well. Items for sale on the site range from a USD 20 beaded necklace to a USD 11,000 diamond engagement ring. For users who received something other than jewelry from their ex, there's also a category entitled 'Gifts that should have been jewelry.' Once they've sold their goods, users can even donate some of the proceeds to the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation through a button on the site."

Thursday, May 15, 2008

"I'll have mine the new black."

Take my word for it, B-vitamins are the year's new black. Now you can even add them to your Starbucks. Evil yet Grande at the same time.

"To add buzz to your daily grind, order your Starbucks drink "plus energy" and you'll get a shot of their latest ingredient, a potent mix of B vitamins, ginseng and gaurana (an Amazonian fruit packed with caffeine). It can be mixed into any hot or cold drink, so you can add an energy boost to all your favorites."

I can't wait to meet my new brain: the Starbucks Doubleshot™ on Ice +Energy.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008


Found at trendcentral's article of the day:

"With schools and parents across the country taking small steps to combat the obesity epidemic among our nation's youth, Bob's Pickle Pops have emerged as a healthy alternative to sugary frozen pops. They are exactly what you think they are: frozen pickle juice and you may be surprised to learn they're a Texas favorite."

Without a nutrition label in front of me, the sodium content concerns me, but what doesn't concern me most days than not. So who cares. I'd like to try one of these pickle-sicles just to say I did.

I'm wild, I tell ya. Just wild.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Tuesday Morning's Scribute to 10am:

Happy Anniversary to me.
Nineteen months megalomaniac-free,
nineteen months without That Look on my face,
nineteen months away
from someone else's unbalanced trapeze whims
and nineteen months happier.
And guess what:
I haven't starved,
and I'm more than just alive.
I'm living and happy.
If you aren't,
don't worry what they say, you can change it.
Sooner than nineteen months later,
you'll be glad you did.

And ps: You deserve nice flowers.

Need more inspiration?
Here's a good article from the growinglife.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Nancy Cartwright has my dream job.

(watch the volume level on this one, but enjoyyy.)

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Get to know me:

I think no time is ever wasted reading magazines or watching "The Beverly Hillbillies".

ps: Happy Mother's Day to all moms out there. When people ask I meet ask me if I have any kids myself, I say "Oh yeah probably, scattered all over the country. Devil only knows how many." Why not. I'm on the road back to Memphis again. See y'all soon. xox

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Get to know me:

I have a thing for Stephen Merchant, Guy Garvey, and a thingie-thing Eddie Izzard.

Friday, May 09, 2008

Get to know me:

There's never really anyone to vote for in the Presidential elections.

Thursday, May 08, 2008

Get to know me:

I can't write/work anymore without wearing my headphones. And I hardly have time to write these days. One of those has to change, and I'm not giving up my headphones.

ps: Report from doctor was stellar indeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed.

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Road-trippin' slash off to the doctor until Sunday. Reports will be stellar, thank you Big Daddy G in the Sky.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Leave it to Canada for a great idea, eh?

Even though I love cheap, tacky souvenirs myself, here's a very cool article about redesign/recraft/upgrade taken from Springwise newsletter | 7 May 2008:

"Who hasn't returned from a trip laden with cheap, tacky souvenirs? In the hopes of keeping more such items out of the dustbin—where they inevitably end up—Canada's Souvenir Shop offers redesigned, recrafted and upgraded Canadian souvenirs.

Created by Toronto's Gladstone Hotel and Motherbrand, a design firm dedicated to preserving Canada's local culture, Souvenir Shop features a range of specialty and limited-edition items crafted by Canadian designers. The site's Maple Leaves Lamp, for example, was created by Ani+Lumigrane and Frédéric Guibrunet of cut paper; pricing is CDN 250. Ouno Designs' Fur Lifejacket, meanwhile, is a conversation piece made from reclaimed Hudson Bay Company Furs' mink and priced at CDN 500. Then there's the Pierre Trudeau doll, crafted of felt and available in a variety of outfits, priced at CDN 100. Jewelery, books, housewares and clothes are also available for shipping both domestically and internationally.

Is there anything under the sun that can't be upgraded? We think not! How about bringing this approach to the souvenirs from a region near you?


Spotted by: Sheri Allain"

Monday, May 05, 2008

Do you smell bacon?

Watch out for the noises when you open this link. There's no other way to say it but "Here's the pig fart game." Boy. Imagine the grossly perverted Google searches I'll get here now. Enjoy.

Friday, May 02, 2008

Thursday, May 01, 2008

Get to know me:

I think that true love and Botox are concepts best left on paper.